Smiles:)

Thanks to my dear neighbor I was reminded that people actually do read my blogs!!! I apologize for not writing for over a month. Where to begin...

Ahhh yes, teeth. My mouth has been a source of pride and pain in my life. I had braces when I was 13? for approx. 5 years. Had jaw surgery, a chin added, head gear, a tooth brought down from the roof of my mouth, oh the joy! Highshcool was a wee bit of an awkward time to say the least. I definitely felt like once the braces were removed, and I got my first pair of contacts I felt like I emerged a butterfly!!! I've always been complimented on my smile. I love my smile and teeth. As of today, it's official that I will be losing a tooth, not just any tooth, the tooth right next to the front tooth. A main contender... I am only 32 and they are talking about partial dentures/a bridge. I'm really in a state of shock. My dad wants me to just yank it out and leave a big gap, which he swears will eventually be filled in by the other teeth. I just don't know what to do. I certainly don't want my finances to dictate my decision..., because then it would surely be just rip the tooth out. Sigh... I'll let you know what I decide. I feel too young to be faced with these issues!!!! I spent $200 just on getting professional opinions!!!

Anger is an emotion I avoid at all costs, but lately it's been rearing it's ugly head. I've been frustrated with the usual battles weight loss/fitness goals/work/not enough time in the day!!! I was in my friend Rachel's core conditioning class, and about 20 minutes into it, I was really mad! I was frustrated my body would not move the way I wanted it to. I just couldn't do all the plyometric jumps, my boobs were in the way, I just felt very thick and heavy.

The latest on my health plan is I am following the blood type diet. I am an O and apparently I should be eating lots of meat! I was vegan for 2 years, and vegetarian for a long time. I couldn't stand the cruelty to animals. Well, according to my blood type it was the worst thing I ever could have done. So, I'm a week in and have lost 1lb. I'm buying organic free range meat and eating fish. No, wheat/dairy/gluten. I'm going to start training for my running for the Easter Seal fundraiser. I've got new runners, I just have to hit the pavement! I think I may purchase a mini rebounder too. They have them on sale at Toys R Us. I thought instead of laying on the couch while I watch tv, I could jump instead!!! Hope you all are well!!!

Inspiration

Today my good friend Whanduz and I went to 10th Avenue Alliance church today. In today's message, what stood out to me was the importance of community/support from people who are in a like minded mentality(hopefully for the good!). The importance of affirmations was brought up, which I think has more power than we give it credit for. I think about all the negative thoughts that enter my mind on an ongoing basis, and it truly shocks me. I definitely want to work on positive affirmations. I'm truly beginning to see the fruit from the great friendships I have in my life. I've prayed for a long time to be surrounded by people who truly love me for me. Who shared similar thoughts and who also could challenge me too. I've been blessed with a central core that I pray continues to grow in such a beautiful organic way. Rhonda gave me some great ideas today, that I can't wait to start. I'm going to create a visual journal to capture the growth that I am experiencing. We are going to start a whole foods network on facebook, which I think will be a very encouraging/inspiring/motivating group. We can share recipes, share struggles, share victories, am I ever pumped! Well I'm off to do some creating!!!! Live well my friends.

Wellness Show

This weekend I went to the Wellness Show in Vancouver. It was amazing! The first day, I went to see Cory Holly speak and Mariel Hemingway. Cory Holly spoke about achieving your ideal body weight, in a holistic way. It was very motivating and interesting. What stood out to me is that food is a drug to many of us. I know for a fact that is for me. What's crazy is that I've been "dieting" forever. A good friend of mine and I always have said that eating is like drugs to us. To have that fact confirmed was such a relief! Here I thought my problem has been that I lacked motivation, or I just wasn't committed enough. That I'm destined to be overweight. Cory mentioned how it's never spinach or broccoli that we crave and binge on, it's the french fries/chips/ice cream/cookies/pizza...... If I sat down and pigged out on apples, how many could I really stuff in my face, and would it quell that "need". Fascinating! This really changes alot about how I will view my binges(cause it's not going to stop overnight) and how I can drop the addiction and replace with healthier choices. Whenever I think about my weight(which is quite often), I know that I use it as an excuse to not pursue dreams and ambitions. I get really discouraged when I know that I need to get "serious" about losing the weight. I think to myself "Here I go again, cut back the calories to 1600, exercise 6 days a week blah, blah, blah". I anticipate grumpiness and starvation/deprivation. Ok, so I'm quite gung ho right now, because I am not going to limit the amount of veggies/fruit I eat. I'm going to eat lots of healthy food. I will attempt to avoid as much as I can the following items: refined sugar/wheat(it's a real baddy for me)/processed anything(ice cream/McD's/Tim H.)/pork/red meat. I will eat produce in abundance(thank you Ladybug!!!) and in general eat lots of whole foods (brown rice/chicken/salmon/trout/oatmeal/quinoa). I'll keep you posted. I'm going to journal my moods with the food too. I really want to beat this addiction! So here it goes!!!!!!

The Hamster Wheel

Has is it really been over a month since I posted!!!!! Wowie wow wow wow! Time is just flying by! I read my horoscope today, and usually they are so general that it doesn't seem personal, but today stood out at me. It said "THERE'S a pattern becoming clear with you, Virgo. It's one that says you're going in a certain direction, certain being the word you need to look at. Are you going to be predictable or are you going to step off the hamster wheel?". Boy is that ever accurate. I've got the itch to make a change, but I am terrified to take the plunge. What if I fail? What if I don't make enough money to live? or I'll make a change as soon as I lose 100lbs. or I'll make a change when I'm more financially secure. Inevitably, I stay where I am, not losing that 100lbs and just as frustrated as ever. I'm getting really good at distracting myself. I've been oversleeping and watching lots of tv!!! I've had two friends recently tell me I should apply to the school board to be an EA. You get summers off, Christmas, spring break, long weekends, and best of all no shift work! I'm tempted.
If I am truly living the life my soul intended what would that look like? That is the question on my brain. It won't be resolved tonight! I hear Grey's Anatomy calling me......... xoxo;)

Firefly

One of my Christmas gifts this year was the complete season of Firefly. It ran only one season, which is a real shame. I had seen the movie Serenity just this past year and loved it! I had no idea that it was a tv series! I was very happy to receive this gift. I've been watching the shows like crazy! I LOVE IT! It's like a western/pirate/sci-fi comedy all rolled up in one delicious hour. There are rumors flying that they may bring the tv series back because the movie was so popular. I hope that is true!!!!

I start night shifts tonight. Ugh. 11-7am... and 5 of them.... I'll be ok if I get good sleeps! My challenge this week is to go to the gym and workout and eating properly. In the past eating on a night shift consisted of grilled cheese sandwiches, kraft dinner, chips.... all the greasy stuff. I'll let you know how I do!

The first week of January 2007

This is how I felt this past week!!!! It's great, my body is in sync with the moon! So, I've been practicing my affirmations, especially prior to challenging situations. It's totally worked! I'm ready to start practicing on a grander scale.

I want to change careers, I'm just trying to get clear on exactly what I want to do. I'm torn between choosing a job(s) that would increase my income, or a job that would satisfy my soul. Can they both exist together? That would be fantastic. I love to work hard, I'm not an office girl. I'm a people person. I met a girl this week who's father is a mortician. He loves his job! I have to tell you it piqued my interest. I've always been attracted to the obscure. At one point I volunteered to help forensics do a search for dead bodies(the sergeant was more interested in me, rather than help me with my career). Has anyone seen family plots? Who doesn't love CSI? They make it pretty flashy, which wouldn't be the real world. One of my favorite shows is "Medium". Perhaps because there are many spiritually sensitive people in my family.

Now, onto something unrelated. I put my first order in for "Ladybug Organics". I am so excited!!! I will be receiving organic produce/poultry/dairy all at my front door! Yeah!!!! If I had a family, this is the way to shop. I was sipping my detox tea and ordering my food for the week. So brilliant! I'll let you know how it turns out!

I did it!